Love it or detest it , April Fools ’ Day is pretty meek in the twenty-first century . Krispy Kreme say you it ’s changing its name to Krispy Cream or something and you ’re supposed to be “ tricked . ” Then everybody roll their eyes and goes on with their aliveness . But back in the nineteenth 100 , April Fools ’ Day was hardcore .
April Fools pranks of the 19th century were either terribly unfunny or downright dangerous . It really seems like there was no midway ground . According to various stories that I ’ve collected from online newspaper archive , some hoi polloi literally croak pulling pranks .
Back in 2015 , I did a round - up of the horrific April Fools ’ mean solar day japery of the 19th century . It included tale of people being maimed , being unnecessarily cruel to their married woman , and yes , some peopleeven died . In that custom , we have a new batch of floor today .
https://gizmodo.com/the-horrific-april-fools-pranks-of-the-19th-century-1694834642
Some of these 19th century trick are horrendous , while others are harmless to the point of absurdity . But they ’re all straight up weird . The past really is a foreign country . And after scan these flakey April Fools ’ Day story , it ’s believably a country you would n’t want to gossip anytime shortly .
The one where a dead baby needs to be photographed but there’s actually no dead baby
The most comical of all the jokes was that playact upon a lensman employed by Tobias Luck . Mr. Luck and William Spikes beat the put-on together . It was in the afternoon . Mr. Spikes came hurrying into Mr. Luck ’s studio apartment with the information that a babe had died on upper chief street and its parent wanted it photograph . Would Mr. Luck go and do the employment ? Mr. Luck could not , so he step in his employee . The military man loaded up with his television camera and other necessary devices and trudged Frederick North about six blocks . He found the number but no dead baby and it was not till he had returned to the gallery for more detailed information that he remember the date and tumbled .
[ April 2 , 1892 – Oshkosh Northwesternin Wisconsin ]
The one where you lie to a doctor about someone being hurt and then the doctor stabs you to death
Young Mr. Tom Rogers at Kaufman Texas was itch to get off a first - course April fool joke . He run low to Dr. Mosley ’s office and write an ordering on the slate for the doctor to go three mile in the country to see a vernal dame who was critically sick . Of of course the medico suspected nothing when he study his slate . It never occurred to him that anyone would trick him about such a serious matter . He ride out to see his affected role and found that he had been made the victim of a cruel hoax . When he give back to Kaufman he was boiling with rage . He ascertained that Rogers was responsible for the joke , and meet the unseasoned man he at once attacked him with a tongue . The doc was furious and showed no mercy . He stab Rogers repeatedly in the face , neck and body , and did not let up until he had inflicted several fatal wound .
Such a butchery was not justified by the provocation , but Rogers brought his punishment upon himself . His idiotic little laugh was well calculated to provoke ira , and the human beings who without just cause makes his neighbour tempestuous should stand the effect . If Kaufman could get disembarrass of all its foolish April sap jokers the biotic community would be better off .
[ April 5 , 1886 – Atlanta Constitutionin Georgia ]
The one where young women go into town unescorted which is itself a joke somehow
Athens , Ga. Dispatch , 1st .
Eighteen of the young ladies assist Lucy Cobb Institute will be sent home on account of an All Fools ’ 24-hour interval lark this morning just after breakfast at the institute . Those young ladies sneak out of the back yard of the institute grounds and add up down townspeople . Some had their hats on and some were bareheaded . All of them were plainly bent on on having a good clock time , and while on the commercial enterprise streets indulged in halloing and talking . They then went into Gilleland ’s coffee shop and ordered coco - dope . Then they left the clerk with an April fool ’s antic on his hands . At Williamson ’s store they went in and chatted and the shop assistant locked the door on them .
After a while they go out on the streets and rambled around the metropolis considerably . Then they catch a tallyho and took a ride .
Mrs. Lipscomb , principal of the institute , when she discovered their absence at their lessons , did n’t send after them , but sat down and save letters to their parents , asking them to retire the young ladies from the institute at once .
Those letters will be mailed this good afternoon . Mrs. Lipscomb was very much involve by the incident and said it nominate the first falling out of discipline of so serious a nature in the account of the institute .
She felt very kindly toward the little girl involved and regret very much that such an occurrence should have go on , but that as it has happened , there was but one class left her to follow so as to maintain the dignity of Lucy Cobb Institute , and that was to call for the withdrawal of the immature ladies from the institute .
[ April 8 , 1897 – Concord Timesin North Carolina ]
The one where you get married and then back out two months later and say it was an April Fool’s joke
Clarksville Tobacco Leaf : Quite an interesting case for breach of marriage and fraud came up in the Circuit Court Friday . The lawsuit was brought about two years ago by Mrs. Jane Elliott against Jack Allen . It will be remembered that the Tobacco Leaf , in April 1877 , gave an account statement of Jack Allen ’s April fool married couple , have up , as Allen state , to April - fool ‘ Squire Griffin Orgain ; but it seems that Jack carried it on a minuscule too long , and did n’t put one across the Squire much , as the sequel will show .
The following daylight , however Jack met with Squire Orgain and they come to the Leaf office together to have the man and wife announced . They were both in a jovial mood and Jack seemed very happy . Uncle Griffin tell Jack that he ought to make up $ 5 for the ceremonial occasion . Jack said no ; that his wife would pay the bill . Later in the day Jack tell the ‘ Squire that he was not get married ; that it was just a jape take up to April fool him ; and that the license , as he would see by examination , was bogus . “ By grannys , ” replied Uncle Grif . , “ you ca n’t fool me ; I am an officer of the law and not to be trifled with . I perform the matrimony ceremonial in good religion , under the solemn authority of law and ‘ by grannys ’ it ’s got to stick . ” And it seems from the testimony that it did “ puzzle ” for about six or eight workweek , when Jack Allen pulled out and get married another woman , and Mrs. Elliott brought causa for $ 5,000 wrong . There was a strong array of effectual gift on both sides , considerable sparring with the lawyer and much honorable humor and wit . The jury , after hearing the clear charge of Judge Stark , go to bed and in a few minutes brought in a verdict , in which the plaintiff was given $ 2,500 damages , enough to cover the whole of Jack Allen ’s estate .
Moral — Young man , act whatever antic and jokes you will , but do n’t April - patsy a woman in marriage . It cost $ 2,500 to fiddle Jack Allen ’s trick , and Judge Smith , Arthur Munford and Judge Rice ca n’t jest you out of it . You may prove insolvency , or fool a woman in most any other way , but never April motley fool one .
[ June 19 , 1879 – Pulaski Citizenin Tennessee ]
The one where you literally scare your wife to death
Near Nashville , John Ahrens , a farmer , planned an April fool joke on his married woman with fatal result . He mask himself as a tramp , fastened a white masquerade over his side and knock at the door . When she appeared he order her to get dinner party for him . To his horror his married woman fell to the floor in a faint and died an time of day later . Ahrens had been married only a few month and worship his wife . Her death has crazed him with grief and remorse , and he threatens to take his own life .
[ April 11 , 1896 – Weekly Sunin Wisconsin ]
The one where an unmarried woman has a fleeting moment of hope that she will no longer be confined to the life of abject despair that awaited women of the 19th century due to the overwhelming oppression of the patriarchy
In the morning hours an Oshkosh old maid shine over Au - rim spectacles with her usual grinning . All mean solar day long she was alert , for she had receive a note the night before saying that her beloved fried , Mr. Bachelor , would call the following eventide . She watched and she waited . ‘ Twas a cruel trick , but ‘ twas all too dependable , and when the clock struck nine the old maid ’s spirits shot down forty degrees and remain stationary at zero as she discovered from a perusal of the calendar that the particular date was April first . Then the immature valet of the household , the positron emission tomography nephew , was severely upbraided and owned up . The previous housemaid ’s Bob Hope were only once again scattered and sentence moved on in its ceaseless course of study .
The one where you break the teeth of your tenants by putting hard shit in their food
A lady who keep on a boarding menage on H — — street got a corker on her boarders at breakfast . cayenne pepper pepper was liberally sundry with coffee and small pieces of genuine eight cent calico were neatly inserted in the plaza of the wampum in the flapcake . Seven of the boarders have since look up a dentist and it is rumored that the landlady claims a percentage on the profits in the deal .
The one where you put on a mask and the boys can’t tell who you are
The graduating family of the S.W.H.S. held a class societal at the dwelling house of Miss Alice Dummer , last eve , styling it an “ April Fool Party . ” The girls tire out costumes and masks , and they declare that the boys could not penetrate the camouflage and receive out who their partners were , so they had lots o ’ fun .
[ April 3 , 1884 – Sterling Standardin Illinois ]
The one where you tell a customer they have mashed potatoes on their sleeve and you think it’s so hilarious you pop a goddamned blood vessel
But one of the best trick ever perpetrated was playact by a food - passer in a Barbary Coast restaurant — one of those places where the waiter comes out with an armfull of dishes and shoots them out around the board like a pallid - browed gambler dealing stud poker .
It possessed so much originality and mirth - hassle humor of a mellow variety , did this joke , that the waiter is destined to become prematurely keen if he lives long enough . The idea add up upon him like an inspiration and he at once pick out a dupe in the mortal of a middle - aged man with whiskers who was eat at one of the mesa .
“ explain me , ” say the server , scarcely able-bodied to confine his gleefulness , “ but there is some mashed potato on your arm . ”
The man look and immediately saw that he had been jest in the most heartless and humiliating yet intensely ludicrous manner potential , while the waiter went off into paroxysms of laughter . He lastly fall over in convulsions and had to be carry into the kitchen , where he partly recovered only to revive and collapse a blood - vessel , which distressing accident make him to be sent home and the boss had to hire another man to pass by food to his feeder .
[ April 2 , 1892 – San Francisco Callin California ]
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